Why The FUNctional Mom?


Welcome to The FUNctional Mom. I am so glad you’re visiting my little corner of the internet.

Why the FUNctional Mom?  Because it encompasses so much of my heart’s desire for moms of the world (dads, you’re welcome too, of course!).

And because nothing in my life can have a short answer (a trait my introverted husband adores), I must overexplain everything (with a lot of disclaimers in parentheses).  So grab a Diet Coke (or cup of coffee) and get comfy.

My husband, Brett, and I own an athletic training facility called Apex Sports Academy (if you’re a South Floridian, check it out!).  One component of our gym is CrossFit.  Whether you’ve joined the CrossFit cult or not is irrelevant…for my domain name to make sense, all you need to know  is that, in CrossFit, there is a term called “functional movements”.  The purpose of these exercises is to make your everyday life easier.  As a mom, you bend down to pick up your kids approximately four million times a day, so squatting during a workout enables you to do that easier.  As demonstrated in my near decade of mothering without a consistent work out routine (even though I OWN A GYM), you can obviously still pick up your child if you never do squats.  The point: incorporating functional movements into your workout helps everyday life run smoother.

My hope in you reading this blog is that it will somehow make your everyday life of raising your precious kids just a little bit easier…whether it makes you laugh…makes you sigh in relief that you’re not the only one doing {fill in the blank with a million things we beat ourselves up about}…or makes you lock yourself in the bathroom for the five minutes it takes to read it (I am all about your self-care)…I hope your day is a little brighter and you breathe a little easier after stopping by.

There are about 4,762 things I am really bad at when it comes to mothering.  That is just an estimate.  My kids could probably come up with about 10,000 more things.  But one thing I am good at: I have a lot of FUN with my kids.  I laugh a lot (both with them and at them…don’t worry, I will pay for their therapy).  It’s easy for me to see the humor in most every situation (it’s just who I am).  When my kids destroy our house or themselves, I am more apt to grab my camera than actually care.

Exhibit A: my two year climbed on the kitchen counter, reached to the highest cabinet, grabbed the Nutella, and went to town.  I mean, have you tried Nutella?  You can hardly blame the kid.  (And he’s my fourth kid, so I obviously don’t watch him.)


So while I will not win any parenting awards anytime soon (unless it’s a record for the most number of butts wiped in the last ten years) and I blow it as a mom everyday, I have a lot of fun!

Ole Merriam-Webster says  functional means (among other things) “designed to have a practical use”.  The daily life of motherhood is sooooooooo practical and sooooooooo daily.  If I can help you find the FUN in those days, that would just make my day.  And maybe my life.

Lastly, as moms, I think at our core we just don’t want to screw up our kids.  You may have grown up in a dysfunctional home or a really great home.  Either way, it is very possible to have a functional home.  It will not be perfect.  It will be messy.  Smelly.  Frustrating.  Drive you to your wits end.  Cause you to think things you never thought you were capable of.  And all the while, it can still be loving.  Forgiving.  Safe.  Happy.  And AWESOME!

We are in this together, mamas, and I love you dearly!!  Welcome to the FUNctional Mom: where perfectionism goes to die.

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And because I must end with a disclaimer:  In high school, I had two of the most awesome English teachers in the history of ever: Mrs. Bonnie Taylor and Mrs. Kathy Wimberley.  Each of them sparked a love of writing that I never knew I had until having them as teachers.  They are both gifted teachers who taught their students well.  So as I murder the English language and write without regard to rules (and overuse exclamation points…sorry, Mrs. Taylor!!!), please know that they taught me better than that.  And although there are a million people who’ve played a part in who I am today (and subsequent blog writing), I credit these two for any ability I have to compose decent writing.

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